Online climbing forums #1

“Guys I’ve been climbing for 98 hours and I bought this Grigri on eBay for eight bucks but it turned out to be a rusty bear trap. What’s the best width rope to use when belaying with antique hunting gear? Also how did you break through to V4s?! Thanks a ton”

“Well I’ve been climbing for 12 days and I found that what really helped me send my first v9 was learning to focus on using my feet on the holds that are on the wall but also using my hands on the other holds that are higher than the holds my feet are on. Also gyms always provide Grigris so I don’t understand why you would have to buy one?”

“Well that guy didn’t really answer your question so I’ll do my best but first I wanted to point out that in the picture of the bear trap you provided I can see a locking carabiner in the background that appears to be unlocked. I just wanted to give you a brief lecture on how unsafe/stupid you are and remind you that for safety’s sake locking carabiners should be attached to your rope permanently using loctite.

As far as which rope to use it doesn’t matter because gyms will always supply your rope. Happy climbing!”

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3 thoughts on “Online climbing forums #1

  1. Aahahhahahahhaha. Wow this makes me want to find a climbing forum to read through. However I feel I will just be even more scared when I see poorly informed people at a crag.

  2. The only thing I have to say is RUSTY BEAR TRAP!?!? Really? You shouldn’t climb with anything rusty, it’s a good way to get tetanus. That person should hit it with some CLR and a steel brush to shine it up, then follow it with some graphite to lube the moving parts. God knows lube is good to keep the action smooth.

  3. On the other hand, I just saw this somewhere online:
    “Does anyone else get sweaty hands when watching climbing videos? I was just watching a video and it always happens when i watch this petzl video i got with my harness. Every time my hands sweat i just wanna go climb”
    And that is pretty adorable and awesome. You can almost smell the psych from this guy, so stoked about his harness and this rad new sport.

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